See me E.C.

Transmission interrupted:  I have to interrupt my previous lines of thought, and the draft of my new post, to bring you this inspiring, crazy news about the business of when nature calls.  You may not want to hear this, particularly if you are not the mother of a small child.  And surely, Benjamin will want to strangle me later in life when he discovers that I've shared such personal information of his... But, heck, here goes anyway.

How to put this... Well, okay, so Benjamin needed to go to the bathroom.  And I took him.  And business was done.  Not the pee kind of business. He's done that lots of times. This was a milestone. It was the other kind of business.  Yeah, I was some kind of excited.  You could say that.  :D

E.C.  --> The modern lingo meaning 'elimination communication'.

My overly simplistic definition of E.C.?

Learn when your baby needs to go to the bathroom, and take him.  Or her.

Never heard of E.C?  Yeah, me neither til I was pregnant.  Funny how little seeds that are planted can actually give themselves to fruition over time.

I came across this method/way of life on some natural mama website something or other.  Newborns can go to the potty, they said.  I did the whole... "Whaaaat?" thing, and then disregarded it.  Crazy people.  Crunchy mamas.  Granola.  Mmmrhmm.  Hemp.

Came across it again sometime when Ben was a few months old by reading about/hearing about a book titled, "Diaper Free."  I thought... "That's really strange, but interesting."  Around that time, Ben had a horrible diaper rash that lasted for-freaking-ever, and after about 4 dr. appts., multiple prescriptions and loads of OTC creams and ointments, I did what seemed like the only thing I could do.  Naked time.  Healed him up in days.

While he was having his naked time, around 3 or 4 months old, I noticed that, hey... he's not just going to the bathroom all the time, all over the place.  Maybe there's something to that whole taking the baby to the potty thing.  But, I pushed it out of my mind again.  We were using gDiapers and I felt pretty good about that decision, with the biodegradable pads.  And there's enough to do and worry about with a new little one... so who's going to let their child go diaper-free??  What a headache! What a mess!  Right?

Still later, I read more about the subject. I don't know if it was the book I read, "Beyond the Sling," by Mayim Bialik (former Blossom star) or some other reason, but I decided to look into it further.  Did a little digging around online and here's what I found.

Elimination communication is just that.  It is not potty training. It is taking your baby to the potty when you think they need to go.  You know they need to go because of their cues, and routines.  Timing can be very valuable.  There is no punishment/reward thing in action. It is a no-pressure, no-worry kind of thinking.  This is good for me.  I worry about enough already.  This is meant to be easy.

Apparently, diapers are a very western invention.  People have been living diaper free in other parts of the world for many, many years.  The thinking is really that, babies don't want to pee and poop on themselves.  Surprised?  You know how animals (thinking of my sweet dogs here) have an instinct that they won't use the bathroom where they sleep?  That's why we keep our dog in our bedroom at night, and why some people crate them.  Well, it's similar with babies (so I've read).  As young as newborns, they will make some kind of sign (squirming, crying, etc.) before they 'go', and it can be slightly different for every baby.  They apparently don't want to go on themselves.  I have since discovered, what I believe to be proof of this in the following way.  Many times, Benjamin will have a dry diaper when he wakes up.  If I take him to the bathroom in the first 5-10 minutes after waking, he will go in the bathroom.  It's like he's holding it.

So, now doesn't it seem just a little bit weird that our babies spend 2-4 years in diapers, until suddenly one day, we begin to chastise them for peeing and pooping in their diaper, after that's what we taught them to do for so long.

Now this is vague, so I apologize for my poor memory... but, I read something about people in other parts of the world being baffled that we (in this country) nurse for a short time and use diapers for a long time, when they are the opposite, nursing for 3-5 years and almost never using diapers.

Okay, it's starting to sound like I'm on my soapbox again. But I assure you, I cast no dispersions on anyone who doesn't want to do this E.C. thing.  It's unconventional from our frame of view, and I totally get that.  I was hesitant myself, and even now, only do it part-time.

Back to the story...

Around the time Benjamin turned 9 months old, I figured, what the heck... Let's try mornings.  I let him go diaper free for the first two hours every morning before his first nap.  We have hardwood floors downstairs, so clean ups were very easy.  I just watched him closely as we went about our regular daily activities.  I noticed when he would go, and I would clean it up afterwards.  After a few days of this, I decided to take him to the potty by mimicking holding positions from what I had read online.  I've since found multiple ways to hold him so he'll go.  I also bought a potty training seat.

Requirements: 

1) You have to be okay with accidents.  That alone will stop most folks right there. But, let's face it. If you have a child, you've been peed or pooped on, or both.  Floors and clothing clean up. 

2) You have to be motivated in some way for your child to be diaper free.  Benefits include... saving money on diapers, giving your child more air-time/less diaper rash and discomfort, holding a child without a bulky diaper on, experiencing a greater connection with your child, etc.  There's actually 75 reasons 75 Reasons to go Diaper-Free (click Practicing EC) so find one that speaks to you.

At first Benjamin wasn't sure what to do when I held him over the toilet, but I knew he needed to go. So, I would pour a little warm water on his lap.  This would usually make him go, and as he peed, I would make this sound, "Spssppsspppspspss."  I was so amazed by this.  By the third day, Ben was peeing in the toilet 6 times a day.  I was stunned.  David was stunned.  Eventually, Benjamin began to pee without the warm water on him, but just the sound.  He has done this with me, with David, on different toilets, including his potty chair, and most recently, with a small audience.

This is great, but how in the world do people do this all the time?  On car trips? In grocery stores? Overnight?  Now, that, I haven't quite figured out yet.  When we are out and about a lot, Ben stills wear his diapers. When we are upstairs on the carpet, Ben wears his diapers.  And I'm okay with that.  If you read online at all, you can find loads of suggestions from people who do this 24 hours a day.  They will 'pee' their babies in the middle of the night by keeping a small potty beside the bed, or will put wool layers on the bed in case of accidents, etc. I'm not there yet.

But I am thrilled that we've been able to do this part-time.  One of the major questions I had was how to get him to the potty if he had to do more than just pee.  So, now we've come full circle. Back to how I started this post, which is this.  Babies will make a sign that they need to do that kind of business.  You take them to the bathroom, and they will go.  You just have to be quick.  ;)  (And refer to requirement #1 above... You have to be okay with accidents.)  The cool thing about this too, is that clean up was a snap.  No poopy diaper, smeared disaster area.  Nice and neat!

I don't know what life will throw at me. No one does.  Maybe I can continue this, maybe I can't.  But the times when it works is gratifying enough to make me want to try.  Maybe you're up for it too??